I'm Bringing A Jacket

An overtly religious acquaintance once told me I was going to hell. For what? Who knows? I was probably being lewd, lascivious, intentionally rude, crude, or otherwise socially unacceptable. I inquired as to the commenters plans to travel to such a place hisself. Quite abruptly and certainly, he replied with a resounding "no." My only reply was that at least he wouldn't be there to make it miserable.

I discovered some exciting news this afternoon. It seems that the powers that be decided that it would be a good idea to have a series of benefit concerts for those poor, poor African nations with all of those natural resources and no pieces of paper with dead American presidents on them, the powers that be being Bob Geldof. You may remember him from such groups as the Boomtown Rats, Band Aid, and Live Aid. Quite a production with tons of headline bands playing in various cosmopolitan cities across the globe, intentionally taking place on the eve of the upcoming G8 summit in Scotland.

Enough background, let me get to my point. One of the shows is in London, at Hyde Park. And while there are some notable groups playing there, I find it most intriguing and interesting that the line-up includes the one and only, Pink Floyd. Including Roger Waters. Apparently they let him out of the mental ward. And in case you don't know, the Pink Floyd post-Roger Waters albums were only slightly better than Zamfir, Master of the Pan Flute. Man that fucker can rock the hell out of a pan flute. As a matter of fact, these post-Waters albums were the inspiration for Queensryche to record an entire album in the style of Pink Floyd doing a cover of Queensryche doing a cover of Pink Floyd.

The concert is free. Apparently awareness is much more important than cold hard cash. As such, I imagine that Hyde Park will be quite overwhelmed. I would say that it would be packed with the rowdy Floyd fans of the past, but it'll be surprising if they can get their walkers and wheelchairs through the gates and can manage to last the show without having to rely on their Depends undergarments. Depends on whether they're wearing them or not. Ha! Extremely bad joke intentional. But I'd have to say that it will likely be dominated by those "cool kids" these days that know their Pink Floyd music, as long as it came from Dark Side or The Wall.

So, indeed. Hell has frozen over. I know they already said that for the Eagles. But who thinks the Devil actually rocks to those shitty ass pussies? Relegate them to the farthest reaches of B98.5 where they belong, right between James Taylor and Kenny G.

And David Gilmour had this to say:

"It's crazy that America gives such a paltry percentage of its GNP to the starving nations."

You know? He's right. Let's give them what they deserve. Zero. Why not the Brits? It's not like we went over and took over most of Africa's shit years ago. Except for all of those slaves. And that was mostly the Brits, too. All I'm saying is it's not like you hear native Africans speaking English like an American. Hell, they'd have kicked some serious despotic dictator ass by now if they were.

Tell you what Dave, love you and all, and not in a gay way, but stick to what you know and wail on that git-fiddle. I'm pretty sure our "percentage" is more than other nations' totals.

And to those(2) of you reading this, when you join me and the big guy downstairs don't forget to bring your jacket.