Saturday, December 23, 2006


Reggie Ball gets a 'D'. Unfortunately, it's not a 'D' of the variety that will save his ass when he's sucking it up on the field.

Wednesday, December 20, 2006

early christmas 2006

Best news I've heard all month.

It's the forced coaching decision that should have been made voluntarily more than a month ago during game play against Georgia. I guess I'll have to beleive in divine intervention, even if it only happens either during Hannukkah or right before Christmas.

Just A Good Ol' Boy

Does this sound the least bit shady?

Wouldn't be an issue under the Fair Tax.

Sunday, December 10, 2006

get perpendicular!

What do you get when you cross nerds, SchoolHouse Rock, bad 70's jive music, a marketing team with too much crack rock, and a creative department with too much time on their hands?

The answer is here.

Sunday, December 03, 2006

meme? isn't that what some kids call their grandma?

B's making me do this. At gun point, no less, so I apologize in advance for the sweat on the keyboard and choppy/crappy responses.

1. Flip to page 18, paragraph 4 - in the book closest to you right now, what does it say?

Of course it's the longest paragraph in the chapter!

"Normally, Nancy would willingly have taught Jolene to prepare an entire turkey dinner; she felt it her duty to be available when younger girls came to her wanting help with their cooking, their sewing, or their music lessons- or, as often happened, to confide. Where she found the time, and still managed to "practically run that big house" and be a straight-A student, the president of her class, a leader in the 4-H program and the Young Methodists League, a skilled rider, an excellent musician (piano, clarinet), an annual winner at the county fair (pastry, preserves, needlework, flower arrangement) - how a girl not yet seventeen could haul such a wagonload, and do so without "brag," with, rather, merely a radiant jauntiness, was an enigma the community pondered, and solved by saying, "She's got character. Gets it from her old man." Certainly her strongest trait, the talent that gave support to all the others, derived from her father: a fine-honed sense of organization. Each moment was assigned; she knew precisely, at any hour, what she would be doing, how long it would require. And that was the trouble with today: she had overscheduled it. She had committed herself to helping another neighbor's child, Roxie Lee Smith, with a trumpet solo that Roxie Lee planned to play at a school concert; had promised to run three complicated errands for her mother; and had arranged to attend a 4-H meeting in Garden City with her father. And then there was lunch to make and, after lunch, work to be done on the bridesmaids' dresses for Beverly's wedding, which she had designed and was sewing herself. As matters stood, there was no room for Jolene's cherry-pie lesson. Unless something could be canceled."

A beer on me to the first that can identify the book.

2. If you stretch out your left arm as far as possible, what are you touching?

If I were Stretch Armstrong, the wall. As I am not, just a pillow on the couch and a PS2 controller.

3. What's the last program you watched on TV?

Reruns of Scrubs last night.

4. Without looking, guess what time it is.

9:18pm (man, one minute off!)

5. Aside from the computer, what can you hear right now?

Wife tearing up junk mail, David Caruso on a TV commercial.

6. When was the last time you were outside and what did you do?

For actual most recent, emptying the trunk of the car. For an extended period where I actually did something outdoor-sy? Yesterday, watching the barn-burner that was the ACC Championship football game. A scramble to see who could finish worst. Tech won in that respect.

7. What are you wearing?

Jeans, Timberland hiking shoes and a gold Tech hoodie.

8. Did you dream last night? If you did, what about?

I never remember my dreams. I think it means I'm schizophrenic. Sometimes, I realize I'm dreaming and I tell myself to remember what I dreamed about but it never works. Whatever it was, it was probably retarded.

9. When was the last time you laughed?

There was probably a time or two yesterday but I don't remember what it was about. It probably involved talking trash about Tech's sorry excuse for a quarterback.

10. What's on the walls, in the room you're in right now?

Our house is sad. All we have on the wall is a wreath and two candle-holder-thingy's (they have a name I can't recall). And our walls are HUGE! We are obviously very into material possessions.

11. Have you seen anything strange lately?

I probably ate it.

12. What do you think about this meme?

It's okay. I've seen worse, I've seen better. I was mostly just looking for an excuse to update my pathetic excuse for a blog.

13. What's the last film you saw?

The new Bond flick. Sorry, I had to figure out how to turn off underlined text there.

14. If you became a multimillionaire, what would you do with the money?

To steal from Brian, mostly becuase it's retarded to retype pretty much the exact same thing. Except I'm taking out the part about giving some of it away, at least at first. I think I'm part Jewish.

"I would pay off all of my debts as well as those of my family. I would buy new cars for my wife and I, but not terribly fancy ones. We would travel a bit, but not all at once. I would probably quit my job, and start working towards figuring out how to open and operate a small brewery/brewpub, and when I felt confident I was ready to do so, do so. Sock the rest away and live off the interest if the brewery doesn't work out."

I think there's a reason B and I are good friends.

15. Tell us something about yourself that most people don't know.

Sometimes I go to bed without brushing my teeth. But only when I'm going up from passing out on the couch because it's too dark to find my way to the toothbrush without waking the wife. I'm sort of narcoleptic after 10 PM and I feel like total shit anytime I wake up before 5-6 hours of sleep and the thought of the taste of toothpaste in that state makes me sick to my stomach. This probably happens once a week.

16. If you could change ONE THING in this world, without regarding politics or bad guilt, what would it be?

I'm kind of inclined to say that I'd like to see easier to use public transportation. I met all sorts of cool people riding the train to grad school and it was so much fun riding the shinkansen in Japan. Of course, we're not stuck on a small island where everything is really close together.

17. Do you like dancing?

If I think it will get me laid.

18. George Bush?

Not a Republican. Of course, no Republican is these days. No, I don't long for the old days, because honestly I didn't give a rat's ass until the late 90's. I just don't understand how you can call yourself a conservative and not veto some of the shit that's come across that desk. His daughters seem fun.

19. What do you want your children's names to be, girl/boy?

Anything you say at Starbucks sounds pretty fancy for fancy-pants names. Mocha Frappucino. Venti Americano if I were Italian. Or I could just take cues from my family and do the traditional white trash names. Ty Ruger, Kyleigh, Bayleigh, Cody, Tyler.

20. Would you ever consider living abroad?

Does Montana count? I could do Canada or eastern Europe for the hockey alone.

21. What do you want God to tell you, when you come to heaven?

"How'd you get through security?"


"Dude, where's all of your stuff?"

22. Who should do this meme?

Anyone who likes it. Or just needs a good excuse to waste 20 minutes.